Diagnoses: A Digital Expression of My Mental Illness
If the title of this post wasn’t enough of a “Wait…what?” moment, here’s some more information. November 18, 2018 I got sick. I’m sure it wasn’t the “click of a switch in my brain” it felt like, and I have been dealing with mental illness my entire life. But that day, it felt like a switch flipped. And I got sick. And then, I got sicker. And over time, I’ve gotten better. And sometimes, worse.
But to flash forward 50 weeks, I’m doing alright today. I regularly see a therapist, psychologist, primary care doctor, and holistic wellness professionals, which I know I am extraordinarily lucky to be able to afford. In my time working with all kinds of different doctors, therapists, and incredibly supportive loved ones, I’ve been fortunate enough to get a few diagnoses that have helped both me and my doctors begin to cope with these feelings and begin the lifelong process of healing and progressively feeling better.
I’ve been rather private about the details of my struggle, as it’s definitely something deeply personal to me. But I’ve received so much empathy and support, and far too many “me too’s,” so I think it’s time to be more vocal about what I’m actually working with. Rather than spelling it out in words, I wanted to create graphic representations of my diagnoses. Forgive my presenting them with limited captions and explanations. I hope you are able to see — and feel — what I’m showing you. And if you are struggling, please reach out for help. 1-800-273-TALK.
Major Depressive Disorder. Stare at this image until you see it. Just like depression — sometimes you don’t even know it’s there. It just feels…foggy.
Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Expand this image to get the full effect. PTSD is like having a thousand sirens and alarm clocks going off in your brain. All the time.
Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. All arranged into perfect rows, this image shows the (sometimes physically) painful cycle OCD can induce.
If you have mental illness, know that there are so many of us who are in this together. Know you are loved, supported, and things get better. Hang in there, reach out for help, and know that you are not alone. <3